I decided to write a slightly different post to my usual stuff; I’d like to focus on self confidence, life choices and free will, as well as doing whatever YOU please, and choosing your own path. In this post I shall refer to locals, online pals, work buds, family, old friends – you name it – as the public (its much easier than naming each group singularly).
Personally I try to selectively follow as many quirky and interesting ig & twitter accounts as well as bloggers, I like to have a gander and a read at all sorts of different content, and if you’ve been here for some time you’ll already know my head is packed with lots of useless facts and information. Following lots of different bloggers made me realise quite some time ago that there will always be someone out there, who’s ready to give you shit for just about anything – for instance, I follow this mad hot girl on both ig and twitter and the other day she tweeted:
Baring in mind there is absolutely nothing wrong with her looks. I always see plenty of awful comments on many of the other bloggers feeds, so go figure. You don’t however, see these guys stop creating content and posting their stuff – I’d imagine they’re not overly pleased with such feedback but I can’t see where they’re letting it stop them do their thing. I suppose you’ll never stop people getting a kick out of getting their negative feedback out there, regardless of how irrelevant, but you can change your perception of it.
This brings me to my second point, which is self confidence and how many people lack it (take no offence btw) but I see it everywhere, and it’s not a good thing at all – a lack of confidence can stop a person from achieving their dreams (sounds stupidly cliche) like a starting out MUA for instance – you want to become the next Plouise but you constantly kick yourself down for not being as good as her or another MUA you’ve seen take ig by storm. Just have a little faith and give it some time. I’ve been following Holly Boon for so long now and if I’ve learned anything from her (other than all her makeup tricks lol) is that you have got to focus on YOU and just keep pushing, regardless of how distant your goals appear to be, all you need is a little faith and a hell of a lot of hard work. (I won’t go in to too much detail about blogging individually as that’s not what this post is about and I will write about that at some point soon)
The same goes for jobs and careers as well as hobbies – you see someone your age or younger achieving something you could only dream of, you’ll feel one of the three:
• jealousy – you’ve not achieved that yet, why have they? But they shouldn’t have! The audacity.
• anger/disappointment that you’re not as advanced as they are
• pride/happiness – you’re pleased with someone else’s milestone and would rather look up to them for inspiration than look down on them for literally no reason.
If you’ve read about changing your mindset and the way your mind works, and you’re one of those non-believers ‘It’s not possible to change your mindset and the way you think. Tell that to people with depression’ – ok, two completely different contexts. Picture this: you wake up in the morning, put some happy tunes on, leave the house. Unless you were previously distracted by a negative event, 9 times out of 10 you will be in a neutral/good mood until another event comes along, that being positive (you remain in a good mood) or negative – now it is up to you how you perceive the said event, and it is also up to you to decide whether, and if so, how it affects you and your mood. Hundreds of articles circulate the internet proving this to be true, and millions of people would agree. I definitely believe in changing your mindset and your perception on things, I have recently had sooo many events happen in my personal life which would get most people really quite down and upset, and I’ve just worked through those.
Now I am in no way saying I don’t get bothered or upset by events which would upset most others, what I am saying is I work my way around my problems and rather than dwelling on them, my instant response is finding a solution to the problem.
One of the worst things I see all over the internet absolutely constantly is people procrastinating to the point of no return, then complaining to their mates that they’re not really achieving anything, that they’ve missed their deadline, that they were late to this or that social event – stop this. Stop causing yourself inconveniences, then moaning to your pals about those exact inconveniences, then proceeding to continue making those exact same mistakes. Chances are, your mates are bored of listening to you complain about procrastinating, then watching you procrastinate some more – they are probably too polite to tell you about it.
The only person whose way you’re standing in by procrastinating, is your own. I know it sounds easier said than done but get up, and get on with whatever you’ve been putting off for the past three months; don’t think about it, just get up and get on with it. You will feel fulfilled and productive, knowing you have finally achieved things you’ve been putting off for so long.
Now this isn’t me being a simple hypocrite, because we all procrastinate sometimes (I do too; ever so rarely but I do) and when I do, I hate myself for it, then I snap out of it.
How are you planning to achieve your lifetime goals if you’re not willing to get up and work for them? There is no ‘I can do it tomorrow’ ‘it can wait’, as that could have been your lifetime opportunity you’ve just put off and lost once and for good. Find the confidence within yourself to get up and do whatever needs to be done.
At the same time, we must respect ourselves enough to know when we have had enough, or when we’ve achieved everything we possibly can achieve here, and to move on. A simple example of this is a job you’ve been working for eight years and are so bored and so unfulfilled within, knowing you’ve achieved all your potential goals and targets – if you’re not happy and theres nothing else you can do to change your circumstance at that exact place, don’t be afraid to go off and start elsewhere, knowing elsewhere will offer you exactly what you’re asking for, if not more. (please understand I am not encouraging you all to leave your long-term employment and go work in strawberry fields or whatever)
This brings me to highlighting the fact you should focus on what YOU want to do, what YOU want to achieve, and whatever it is you fancy doing. To put it in perspective, if I was so focused on what audience I would/wouldn’t have on this blog, or what my friends or family would think of it, I would never have started writing it 3 years ago. Always focus on yourself – as selfish and awful as it sounds, always out yourself and your needs first. You were born alone, and you will die alone, so the only person whose opinion should really matter to you, is your own. SOOOO go and post that Instagram photo if thats what you fancy doing, dye your hair a stupid colour if that’s what you want to do, get that tattoo, simply do whatever you feel is right for you, not for anyone else. You were not put on this Earth to fulfil anyone else’s needs but your own, so focus on those.
Now this reminds me of the Law of Attraction – literally please read up about it, test it out, then let me know if it worked for you, as I know it definitely has done for me. Law of attraction has helped me calm down insane amounts, as well as setting myself new goals to focus on and achieve. Good things will come your way if that’s what you truly want and work for, and surely that’s what we all want?
Okay so this has ended up being a lot longer than I’d originally intended, and here we are now 1500 words in and I can’t seem to be able to shut up. Let me know how you feel about any of the above and if it has worked for you in the past, or if you are willing to trial out any of the things I mentioned above. This is the end of this post now I promise!!